Laura and I have been on a three day drinking and Olympic binge. I don't even know where to start.
First off we have had many new challenges with the cab drivers. If Laura didn't have her cell phone hot dialed to the hotel to have them talk drivers in from wherever we are we'd still be picking rice in a field somewhere. One driver decided to get us across the street from the hotel after going 12 miles an hour on the freeway all the way here. When the time came for him to flip a bitch and get us home he balked and simply meandered down the street about four blocks before we just got out and walked back. If and only if (not saying we did this) but the walk was just long enough to have a smoke along the base of the elevated train back to the hotel. The driver this morning for example took us around a 20 min tour of the city in a circle before actually asking us where we were going (we made the dumb ass assumption that he knew where we were going). Ok enough about the cabs.
We did head down into the city on Friday, after meeting Erik Vendt's parents in the lobby after I had too many cups of coffee with corresponding bathroom visits we headed out to the Forbidden City. City was beautiful but after walking through 3 gates and 17 tea rooms we were ready for some refreshment. Laura and I decided to have a beer in the inter garden. BTW remind me to re-watch the Last Emperor when I get home. Beers in random places will become a theme so watch out.
Tienanmen Square was nice. Not actually as large as I thought. I was expecting check point Charlie kind of crap since that seems to be the center place of political dissent in this country but instead all we found was a bull shit "security screening" with light metal detectors and a sign reading to the effect that I couldn't protest or bring in weapons and pornography. I immediately had to surrend my Penthouse since I was hoping to read the articles in the open pollution of the square in all it's glory.
We ended up leaving there to go pick up our massively overpriced tickets that we bought from our ticket broker and drank the day away in the hotel. Not all was lost as we of course got hungry and went to a local eating establishment and had duck crepes, soup, dumplings and of course, more beer.
Since we only talked a big game the first night we felt compelled to drink our limit so we came back to the hotel and drank my, Laura's and some "imaginary friend's" share and past out drunk (which should also explain the lack of blog updates this day). Which reminds me. While we were "socializing" with ourselves we watched 3 hours of the most impressive sport in the Olympic family......equestrian. You've never seen such pageantry, love for sport and complete and total rich douche bags with nothing better to do and at least 8 generations of inbreeding. If I have to watch another fag in a top hat riding around on a beautiful horse he's obviously violated by holding a carrot in his butt cheeks trying to get this horse to jump, turn or mount then I might get sick. So in such a circumstance what can you possibly do? Gamble. So we started betting on..........I don't know, there isn't win, place and show so I through out the fact that the next horse (yes I said horse since they are the only thing in this event that actually do anything) would come in 28th place. Nailed it! In fact Clyde did in fact come in 28th, no medal for him but hell, I should be in Vegas right now. Things only progressed down hill from here.
I have to be up in 7 hours to go to the wall........
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